The show must go on, a phrase that almost everyone has heard at least once. Whether it has been said to you, or the first time you heard it was from Moulin Rogue (that is where I first heard it growing up) or the haunting hit song from Queen, nearly everyone has heard it. It is a beautiful song and honestly another motto that I try to use in my everyday life. You see this traveling Gypsy suffers from invisible chronic illness.
Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, are evil. Like serious I would not wish them on my worst enemy. I don’t often talk about my chronic illness in a public way, but I felt I needed to address it today for some reason. Perhaps as a reminder to myself that the show must always go on, life does not stop for anyone, ever. It just keeps moving forward and so must we.
One of the reasons this blog has had such a slow start and seems to flounder a bit is because I have not been able to indulge as much as I had hoped when I first started it with my photography an travel. When you have limited spoons you have to pick and choose carefully. Most of mine lately have gone to work or family. That is just how I have had to make it work.
I want to make my Gypsy goals work more as well. So I remind myself again that, the show must go on. I am going to start trying to challenge myself to work within a photography challenge at least twice a month to start. I love taking photos and whether I am traveling around the world or not I feel that capturing a fantastic photo can make it seem like you are seeing a place for the very first time.
Have you ever had a moment like that? I can’t wait to have more moments like that. Setting myself this goal will not only encourage me to take photos more again, but to explore my surroundings more again. Doing this is fun for me and it works my sad little pained muscles and joints in a more delicate way.
You never know someone’s battle…
Which brings me to the second thing I wanted to address in this post. Part of how the show must go on. Anyone who has a chronic illness has likely had anyone from a friend, family member or medical professional tell them to excercise more and that will help with the problem.
It very well might help with the problem. What people who say this do not take into consideration is that there are days where the simple act of taking a shower can feel like running a 5k to someone with a chronic illness. As someone who is usually remembered and noted as a super active person, there are days where all I want to do is shout out like this.
Of course I usually don’t end up saying anything like that, but boy do I want to! I usually end up pushing myself well beyond what I should and trust me I end up paying for it eventually. That bill comes due big time. Sometimes it is worth it and other times, it really isn’t. Learning how to work around my chronic illness for me has been one of the hardest things in my life. I struggle still with it daily. I hope someday I will find the right balance.
Until I am able to do that, I have to remind myself that baby steps are okay. Baby steps are still steps after all. So one of my baby steps in balancing, life, work, hobby and everything else is going to be setting myself that photo challenge for twice a month to begin. How will I work it? I am not sure yet I have not thought that far ahead honestly. Maybe I will do a theme, maybe it will just be random. I will work on the details later. For now I am happy with myself for coming up with the plan.
But as ever… The show must go on…
A final note to this post goes to address a question I have had trouble answering but that has been asked of me a few times by different people. It’s done politely and in a way where I know they really are trying to understand things and that is why I am answering the question. I finally found a way to explain it too which is great.
I have been asked many times, what does fibro/chronic illness FEEL like on a day to day basis. Until now all I have been able to say is that it feels like Ow. However, today I came across a meme that explains it perfectly.
So there you have it. A picture is worth a thousand words. To me that is what my chronic illness feels like. That is why just getting up out of bed somedays feels like a victory all on it’s own. It is this that makes me mutter, whatever does not kill me had better RUN on the days I am struggling to do simple tasks. And as ever it is the reminder that, the Show Must Go on.